Signs

The teen years have arrived. In all honesty, it did not really occur to me when we flunked our pregnancy tests, er... discovered we were expecting that the resulting bundles of joy would eventually become the creatures who now inhabit our home, eat our food, allow us to clothe, shoe, and educate them... all while nurturing their growing belief that the mister and I are somehow entirely out of touch. Holy Night, Batman! We have somehow become parents of a teen and a tween.
And it's very much like the day those nurses and doctors allowed us to take home an infant from the hospital. We had no clue what to do with the little guy, but we were game. And we still are. It just seems that the children are less so. This disinterest in our brilliant parenting techniques is a bit demoralizing. I am beginning to wonder if we should make up a set of index cards for the children similar to a set that were briefly utilized early in our marriage before the children could read.
The cards were simple: on each side a single word, "YES" or "NO". A strangely childish method of communication hearkening back to the notes passed in grade school "Do you love me? Yes or No?" I believe we could either stick the card on the fridge or wear it on a string around our necks. The cards were our way of indicating interest in certain marital activities. Primitive and silly, but taking the potential sting out of "rejection" because it was just an index card. Yet, the card indicated whether or not advances from either party were welcome. The card went into disuse when the Boy learned to read and started asking questions we were unprepared to answer.
Yet I think the card might be beneficial again for an entirely different sort of communication. Our elder children have become prickly creatures of late. Yet they still want and need us to pursue the relationships they are pushing away at every turn. Perhaps the card would allow them to reach out for conversation in a way that limits their vulnerability while still allowing it. And gives us a hope of approaching them at the right time which can look much like the wrong time.