Complex

We live quietly amongst the Suburban yuppie hordes. Which means our children enjoy the benefits of good schools with plenty of parent involvement--- both in terms of parental time and money. Our neighborhood is relatively safe because affluence buys both security systems and drive-by security guards--- not to mention some snazzy leisure spots for everything from swimming to tennis. And we live in a nice, normal neighborhood built smack-dab in the midst of this multiple golf course, country club affluence. Our neighborhood (which is perfectly nice) is considered by some of our neighbors to be a bit of a blight on an otherwise well-manicured landscape. I not-so-secretly find this amusing, because my own tendency is toward a bit of reverse snobbery.
Middle child is not handling this very well. She compares us to her friends' families, and we are lacking. Thus far, we are specifically lacking a maid, manicurist, daily restaurant meals, lawn service, backyard swimming pool, dvd player in the car, separate bedrooms for each child, an excess of privately funded fine arts, civic, and sports activities for each child to develop their well-roundedness (It's a word now.), rainbows, ponies, fairies, and unicorns. And I am not, nor have I ever been (or even wished to be) a bikini model. The only car I will be draped across is one that runs me down while I am out walking the mean Suburban streets to maintain my child-bearing, chocolate-eating figure instead of working out at the gym in an outfit that matches my over-priced shoes and professionally painted nails under the careful instruction of a personal trainer named Trevor. Oh, and we say "no" to our kids.
Middle child's concerns have earned her the opportunity to spend a little extra time in her inadequate home environment over the next week without the benefit of certain modern conveniences. The ungrateful little princess is caught up in something of a Cinderella Complex, but I feel fairly certain that we can help her to overcome her circumstances even without a fairy godmother.