Thursday, February 4, 2010

Peer

Yes! The tween has been wanting to see The Lovely Bones. I admit to having read Alice Siebold's book, and consider the storyteller to be brilliant. Peter Jackson is also the most likely fellow to give it the movie treatment worth the ticket price. Our general rule of thumb is that G and PG movies are okay, but that PG-13 is reserved for the 13th birthday and beyond. There are some exceptions, but those are made on a case by case basis. Case by case not meaning a case of murder. Still... I'm not above considering a trip to the theatre to take in the flick myself.
With the content in mind, I offered to take the tween to see the movie. Just the two of us on a Girls' Day Out. She did not leap at the opportunity. Instead, a look of chagrin crossed her face. Oh. Using my slightly faulty Super Mom Perception, or SMP, I asked if the point was less about the movie, and more about going with everybody else. Except the one girl who has spoken out saying she is not interested in going to see a scary movie. We continued to talk, and the mister joined the conversation. We agreed to let her see the film if she really wanted to, but we offered some food for thought. She chewed over the idea that if she really wants to see the movie later, she can. It was also mentioned that once she sees the chilling scenes, she will have those images in her mind's eye whether she wants them or not. Then we left her to marinate overnight.
After school today, she climbed into the car, and I asked about the movie tomorrow. She informed me that The Lovely Bones was off the marquis. Pleased, but curious about the social repercussions, I asked how that went over with her friends. She said that when the subject came up at lunch, she said she was not going even though she had secured parental permission. When asked why, she cited that, "There are some things you just can't unsee." Which cheered the friend who had already decided against the movie. A third piped up that her Mom had said, "No," outright. The fourth joined in solidarity with those not going, and the lone boy in the group determined he would rather hang out with the larger group not going to the movie. Which left the organizer to choose the larger group, and the final holdout finally relented as well. The whole group will instead go see something a bit less harrowing.
I know not every instance of, "... but everybody else is doing it," will work out so well, but it is reassuring to hear that our kid made a decision we hoped for while opting not to make for her. It is doubly so that her circle of friends supported the decision and did not give her a hard time about not quite being ready for some of those things perceived as being more grown-up and mature.

1 comment:

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I applaud their wisdom. "There are some things you can't unsee." SO true.